Hontō no jibun
Looking back to that day, the day of reckoning of ‘anima sacrificium’, I didn’t dreamed that I would become this person that I am now, an abnormality among abnormalities. That day I still feel the after effects, nightmares still renders me sleepless nights. It was the major influence on me making this decision of taking this path, a path sure of destruction or redemption, an end to a means. I wouldn’t class myself as a hero or a bringer of Justice nor a good person, no, I have become that what as scared me for eternity, in other to bring them to the light and revealing their true dark nature to blind world. All that’s on my mind is to bring sweet revenge to those people of that abnormal world. I was young, naive and new to the area not knowing of what dwells within the shadows, believe all the lovely smiles, cheers and generosity p the mass that surrounds this country, “thinking if the rest of the world was like this”. That day reckoning, reveal to me that nothing is as it seems, have stepped into world of darkness and shadow dwellers who feeds on the ‘innocent’ simple minds and ignorance. Death was close, I felt him approaching, and then there was nothing. I found myself on the street, no recollection of anything or anywhere, my mind was blank my soul was blank. I hid in the shadows for days, probably months or even years, I had no concept of time or space, everything blank and desolate. “I am dead?”. I reckon that I was help back to sanity by someone, I don’t remember much after that, still a bit hazy.
Gaining a bit of my sanity that was left, though a place in normalcy was none existence, I needed a place to belong, I needed to become whole but that was just wishful thinking. I know I would have regain what I have lost that day to reach any redemption, but who to go to, who to trust? Who is true? Who is real? Who is genuine? This I will have to do on my own, with my own strength. Only anger stands, both at myself and this world and it needed to be quenched. I drenched myself in studies, learning of the world, both the good and darkness that dwell within, psychology of the human mind, human behavioral patterns. I went deeper and deeper into the forbidding abyss of knowledge, learning what I can and retaining it to memory. we live in a world where the shadow dwellers where masks to hide the darkness within until it’s time to pounce on the unaware prey, like a lion hunting deer. Before long I became that which made me, an abnormality of this abnormal world. I made this decision to be the one to unmask this god forsaking world by any means necessary, this world is unforgiving, it will eat you up and spit you out, taking your soul with it.
On that day I died, now I am just an empty shell roaming the earth looking for a place to belong and to rest, hoping to regain that which I have lost, but for now I will become this world’s Judge. Now, world are you prepare to be unmasked?
Oh you want to know my story? that day of reckoning? The day that lead me to this day of judgement on the world, then lend me your ears….